#107 – Conflict Resolution


“Your mouth is smelly. I don’t want to sit next to you. Go to another seat.” That was what L’s best friend in class said to her last Friday. L bottled it up inside her and only let me know about it when I noticed her being extremely quiet and sad looking before bedtime on Friday night. With a bit of probing, she told me what happened to her that day.

She considered this girl to be her best friend and plays with her a lot during school time. I can really see that it broke her heart when she said that to her. I asked L what she said or did when she heard it and L told me that she moved away and found another seat. My heart was torn into pieces. I am upset that my little girl was unable to stand up to the “not-so-nice” comments and failed to react in a more confident way. There’s no way that her mouth was smelly since she drinks plenty of water and she practices good oral hygiene by brushing properly after every meal. But then again, I realized that L is only 3 years old and as a parent, I need to educate and reinforce to her over and over again on how to deal with such conflicts. She must learn to be able to handle it well cos similar events are bound to happen again, that’s a certainty.

I shared with L’s teacher and asked for her opinion as I recognized that it was a learning moment. I must say that I was rather disappointed with her response. She brushed it aside and said that it’s probably just a fart. She assured me that she would speak with that classmate of L’s. So when I picked L up later that day, the teacher updated me that she spoke with the both of them and got them to hug and make up after an apology. Hmmm, I wonder if there’s a better way to approach this type of issues in pre-school children.

#76 – Starting Nursery

As a mom, I have to say that I’m super ken chiong (anxious) about most things. I have been worrying about how L will cope with new school life without me by her side during class. Will she trip over other kids’ legs cos she can be quite klutzy and I’m not there to look out for her? Will she be pushed over? Is she assertive enough to fend off biters and bullies? The more I think about it, the more worried I get. To the point that S had to tell me ease off cos L is only going to pre-nursery.

The first week came and gone with out much incident and I’m so glad. L seems to enjoy school a great deal and she even showed us to the door and asked us to wait outside for her till class was over. She seems to be unperturbed by the other crying kids in her class. You can’t imagine how glad we are. I guess the numerous pep talk prior to starting nursery helped a great deal in this case.

#74 – Biting Incident

L’s “nemesis”, Kate, in Chinese class (more like mine..haha!) has gone too far. She did not give way on the slide and when L said “excuse me”, instead, she turned around attempting to bite her. My helper was there and put a stop to it right away. My helper later informed me and I was, as expected, fuming mad. I decided to speak with her mother straight away. She apologized to me. She explained that Kate has been biting her at home too (I was shocked and I wondered why she’s condoning it). A moment later, she also got Kate to apologize to L.

I thought about it over a couple of days and decided to inform the form teacher about it as well. She said she was unaware of the incident and will pay more attention to Kate’s behavior. My eyes are peeled on Kate every time we are in the same play area together. This girl spells danger.

#19 – Reno, Reno

I converted one of the walk-in wardrobes to Baby L’s nursery. Because the Chinese superstition forbids any renovation work to be done during pregnancy, I solicited the help of my very kind brother to oversee the entire renovation operation. During my hospital stay of 4 nights, we summoned the contractor and overhauled bits of the house, cleaned up the mess and turned it into a lovely nursery. Quite an accomplishment especially given that it’s not a planned delivery and everything had to be done “on demand”.

#15 – Make Room for Baby L Sale

Did I tell you that I converted two of my three bedrooms into walk-in closets? One of them was for shoes and bags and the other was for my clothes. Now, that meant I had to vacate one of the rooms to make room for Baby L. My husband was pleasantly surprised that I was more than happy to part with my precious possessions for our unborn child. In comparison, I was only willing to give him two-shelf space when he moved into the apartment.

With the help of my beloved family, I organized for a designer sale of pre-loved items three weeks before my due date. Many of my friends came by to support and purchased quite a few items. The proceeds helped to defray some of the hospitalization cost in the end.

With most of the clothes gone, the room was then ready for renovation. My plan was that when I was hospitalized for the delivery of Baby L, my trusted contractor would turn the room around in four days. Needless to say, my family ensured that it was completed without a hitch in my absence.